Being Cheated On - How online counseling in Florida can help

Being Cheated On

Love, trust, and respect are all good things that go into a great relationship. Sure all relationships have problems, but overall you know you can count on your other half to be there for you when things are tough. As the months and years go by, your partner becomes more and more important to you, more important to your life. So when a partner is unfaithful, it strikes you at the center of your soul and hurts so deep you feel like you might never heal. Being cheated on is one of the worst things imaginable in a relationship. All the safety you once felt with your partner, gone in a second. You can’t even think straight.

Many men find that online counseling in Florida can help them after they have been cheated on by their girlfriend or wife.

Then the anger comes. The questions come. Tossing and turning at night, you can’t sleep. During the day your mind is so caught up in what happened you can’t focus on anything except the pain you feel. What can you do to make it all stop? Should you stay together and try to make it work? Should you leave the relationship and start fresh? Can you ever love again?

Talking to a counselor in Florida can help if you have been cheated on.

If you have kids things are even more complicated. Your kids start asking questions that you don’t know the answers to yourself. They might even start having troubles in school or acting out at home. You hate to see them affected by everything, but you don’t know what to do. You do your best to hold it together when you see them, but you can only pretend so much.

Being cheated on can be a very traumatic experience, Quiet Water Counseling in Florida has EMDR Certified Counselors that can help.

Your family and friends all have opinions, but it is easy to have an opinion when they are not the ones who are going through it. They won’t have to face the consequences of whatever decision you choose.

Having support through this difficult situation is so important. A neutral person who knows how tough being cheated on can be. I focus on helping you, as an individual, work through some of those really tough emotions, so you can think more clearly and make decisions that are going to be best for you long-term. If you choose to leave, focusing on starting a new chapter of your life, and putting the pain behind you. But I also help a lot of people who want to focus on healing from the infidelity, so that they can build a stronger relationship with their partner. Many of my clients see me individually before or while they are in relationship counseling (relationship counseling would be with a different counselor than me). Whatever you decide it is important for you to know that you have support to help you get through this tough stuff so you can get back to living the life you want to live.

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Kellie Brown is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC) and Certified EMDR Counselor in Florida.

About the Author

Kellie Brown - Licensed Mental Health Counselor and EMDR Certified Counselor in Florida

As a Certified EMDR Counselor in Florida and Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Kellie Brown, knows that being cheated on is a traumatic event and uses her extensive training to help you start healing as fast as possible. Based in Central Florida but providing online counseling throughout Florida she strives to make getting the help you need as easy as possible.

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I offer online counseling throughout Florida, so you can stay in the comfort of your own home while still getting the help you need. For several reasons, including your privacy, I do not accept any insurances. Click below to schedule a free 20-minute consultation and find out how I can help you start living the life you want.

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Help for Trauma/PTSD

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What exactly is PTSD?

This is one of the most common questions I get so I wanted to take some time and really explain what Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is. Let us start by going over the events that would qualify as traumatic enough to cause PTSD. They include exposure to actual or threatened death, serious injury, or sexual violence. Pretty straightforward and I think we all can agree those are really bad things. That being said we do know that there are lots of other events that are traumatic and can negatively impact your life but they might not meet the full criteria for PTSD in particular.

After that the next thing to look at is the criteria for how people experienced the traumatic event. Of course that includes if a person directly experienced one of those horrific events, but it also includes witnessing in person the event happening to others, learning that the event occurred to someone close to you, or experiencing repeated or extreme exposure to really horrific details of the traumatic event (think first responders/ doctors/police officers/child welfare workers/ etc.). All this being said, not everyone who experiences a traumatic event will develop PTSD. But it is still important to know the symptoms in case you or someone you know starts having problems.

The next criteria for PTSD include several different intrusive symptoms, for example recurrent distressing memories of what happened, distressing nightmares related to the event, flashbacks to what happened, intense distress when reminded of what happened. The other very common symptom of PTSD includes avoiding anything associated with the traumatic event. With PTSD we can also expect problems with remembering parts of the event, negative beliefs about oneself (for example feeling like you are a bad person), maybe the person feels guilty about what happened. Many times with PTSD there is a huge lack of interest or participation in significant activities, like quitting hobbies, not going out with friends, etc. PTSD can cause feelings of detachment from others, and can also make it really hard to experience positive feelings. Many times with PTSD there is irritable behavior, reckless, maybe even self-destructive behavior. Hypervigilance, being easily started, having problems with concentration, and problems sleeping are also all very common symptoms of PTSD.

After a traumatic event many of these symptoms are very common, but they only meet criteria for PTSD if the problems have been continuing for more than a month and causing significant distress in the person’s life. There are also lots of other factors to consider, like are alcohol or drugs impacting things, or is there another explanation for the symptoms, maybe a medical issue, or another mental health issue like depression. It can be very complicated but if you recognize any of these symptoms yourself, please reach out for help. PTSD is treatable and counseling can help.

Counseling for PTSD in Florida - How Quiet Water Counseling of Florida can help.

Quiet Water Counseling provides online PTSD counseling for both men and women throughout Florida. EMDR counseling for PTSD is a well researched treatment that has helped many other women and men get help from PTSD. You don’t have to suffer from PTSD alone. Online EMDR counseling for PTSD in Florida can help. Follow the buttons below to find out more about counseling for PTSD with Quiet Water Counseling of Florida.

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Ready To Get Started? You deserve online counseling for PTSD in Florida today!

I offer online counseling throughout Florida, so you can stay in the comfort of your own home. Schedule a free 20-minute consultation and find out how I can help you start living the life you want.

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Kellie Brown is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR Counselor providing online EMDR counseling for PTSD throughout Florida.

About the Author

Kellie Brown Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Florida

Kellie Brown is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR Counselor in Florida, she is trained in providing PTSD Counseling for both men and women. She knows that getting counseling for PTSD can help turn a person’s life around. She is based in Central Florida but provides online counseling for PTSD, including online EMDR Counseling throughout Florida.

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But I Didn’t Fight Back - Fight, Flight, or Freeze During a Sexual Assault

First, let us think about the basics. A sexual assault is very scary and traumatic event. So scary another part of your brain takes over and starts making decisions. Think Discovery Channel, Animal Kingdom part of your brain. In a way this is good, it is the part of you that knows how to survive… did survive. In a very scary situation a person has very limited options on what to do. Fight, Flight, or Freeze. And your brain has to make this decision in a split second.

Fighting, if the attacker was larger, or had any type of physical advantage, may not always make sense. Flight, really how fast can a person run, and would it make sense to take that chance? So the last option is freeze.

To explain, have you ever seen a opossum play dead? They freeze in survival mode. Story about me - I use to have this huge German Shepard (the sweetest dog in the world but she did not look it) and one night I let her out in the back yard to use the bathroom. I went back a few minutes later to let her inside and she trots into the house with this opossum in her mouth!!!! I made her take it outside and drop it out there, and I felt soooo bad thinking that she had killed it. I watched as it lay there but I couldn’t see any blood at all. Five minutes later that thing jumped up and scampered off, having survived the whole ordeal. Opossums know they can’t run or fight well, especially a huge dog, so they play dead until the threat passes.

Just like the opossum, you saw a huge threat, and your brain and body took over making the decision to freeze in order to survive. But even though you “survived” does not mean that you were not harmed physically and emotionally. A sexual assault affects a person in a magnitude of different ways and it is important that you get the help and support you need to not only “survive” but thrive in your life moving forward.

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Why You Can't Remember All The Details Of A Traumatic Event

Many people find it difficult to remember all the different aspects of a terrible and traumatic event. Some people might think that if an event that horrific happened, then it has to be remembered by the person, all of it, every single detail, but that is not accurate. In fact not remembering all the details of a traumatic event is very common.

Your brain is accustomed to remembering stuff during the course of the day, what road to turn on, or how to make your favorite coffee. But when a traumatic event occurs your brain goes into survival mode and starts storing and remembering things differently than normal. This might mean that certain aspects of the event are way more intense than others. Bits and pieces of memories might come through while other parts are very fuzzy or blank. And it could also mean that you can’t remember large parts of what happened. Your brain was not just trying to help you survive. It was and is still trying to protect you from a lot of those terrible memories.

Some people are happy that they are not able to remember everything that happened but for some people it is very scary and unsettling. Many times a person can go a long time without new memories coming up, and then all of a sudden they start remembering things and it can be very overwhelming.

Remember when I said that your brain wants to help you, and protect you? Well a huge part of that, is your brain wants to help you heal. Even though you might not be able to remember everything, it still happened and your brain knows that something isn’t connecting right. This is when a lot of people might experience nightmares, problems concentrating, or flashbacks. Your brain is trying to make sense of a terrible situation.

Even though all of this can be very overwhelming I want you to know that you are not alone. Even if you don’t remember what happened, counseling can still help you process those feelings that are coming up for you. Whether it happened recently or many many years ago getting help after a terrible event can make a huge difference in your life and how you feel.

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I offer online counseling throughout Florida, so you can stay in the comfort of your own home. Schedule a free 20-minute consultation and find out how I can help you start living the life you want.

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Women in Leadership Keeping It All Together While Stressed

Being a woman is tough enough. Being a woman and a leader is even harder. You have stress from all different angles, and you feel a double standard in your life that you know men do not have to deal with. Balancing work and family, all while looking perfect. Sometimes you feel like a pressure cooker about to explode.

You love your job, your career, being a professional. But sometimes you hate it because of the time it takes away from other important things, like your family, your friends, or even just yourself. You give so much to your career, sacrificed so much to get to where you are today.

You might get asked, ‘How do you balance it all’? And you laugh or maybe cry because you haven’t seen a balance in your life in years. But you at least try to do it all. Try to exercise, try to eat healthy, try to keep the house clean, oh and don’t forget about looking all put together the next day, while surviving only on a few hours of sleep. Dry shampoo might as well be your best friend. And we have not even started talking about the pressures of your family yet.

You feel endlessly drained. You have so many great things in your life, but you are too tired or rushed to even enjoy them. Is this what life is supposed to be? You feel the anxiety, depression, or past hurts creeping up, making things even worse. You want things to change. No scratch that. Things need to change.

Imagine taking back control of your life more balance between work and family. More time for yourself. Imagine feeling like YOU again. Get back to the woman you want to be with real confidence and real happiness. So that you can be your very best and live the life you really want.

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PTSD & Men

Many times, when people talk about Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), they are talking about women. They might mention a male military veteran with PTSD, but very rarely does society ever talk about other ways in which men can get PTSD. Okay, I get it … who besides counselors even wants to talk about PTSD? It is not a fun topic. But when we don’t talk about something, it leaves many men feeling unheard, and all alone with their pain.

Bad things happen to men too, but our society does not like to talk about it. And most men do not want to talk about it either, so they keep these bad things hidden, locked up tight, like a dark secret. Never telling anyone about the flashbacks that don’t let them rest or the nightmares that steal their sleep. When you do not heal, it hurts, and for men, many times, this hurt is turned into anger. Anger about the past, and rage that the past keeps impacting their present.

Our society also sends this message to men that counseling is for women, it’s for people who cannot help themselves, and for people who are weak. And unfortunately, this leaves men feeling that counseling is not even an option for them. So, they continue to suffer in silence, holding the hurt inside.

But for the men who do choose to confront their demons in counseling, healing is possible. Letting go of some of that pain from the past and finding a new strength inside of you. But to do it, you must reach out for help. You must take that first step. I know it is frightening to try this crazy thing called counseling. And I know that a part of you wants to forget what happened so long ago and bottle it up forever, so you do not have to feel that pain.

But I want you to imagine what it would be like if you could let go of just some of that pain, some of that hurt. I want you to imagine a life where the pain of your past does not define your present, and you can move forward towards the things in life that make you really happy.

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Ready To Get Started With Counseling for PTSD?

I offer online counseling throughout Florida, so you can stay in the comfort of your own home. Schedule a free 20-minute consultation and find out how I can help.

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Kellie Brown is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR Counselor in Florida. She has experience providing PTSD counseling to both men and women.

About the Author

Kellie Brown Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR Counselor in Florida

As a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR Counselor in Florida Kellie Brown specializes in providing online EMDR Counseling for both women and men in Florida. She knows that PTSD and trauma comes in many forms and loves helping people to heal from past hurts. Based in Central Florida but providing online EMDR Counseling for PTSD throughout Florida she strives to make counseling easy and accessible to her clients. She wants everyone to get the help they need so if you have a question about online EMDR counseling for PTSD in Florida please reach out.

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All alone at the top

When you are a leader, you have all eyes on you. Whatever you do, whatever you say, you have an audience. Sometimes, you cannot even go to a restaurant without running into someone who knows you professionally. You have to always be “on”, constantly ready to represent your company, your team, your brand. It has taken a long time to get to where you are today, and you do not want to lose it.

But sometimes you just want to go back to when life was simple. When you didn’t have so much stress and so much responsibility. You want to remember what it is like not to have everyone know who you are. Not have to be perfect all the time. You know other people in the same position, other leaders just like you. But you can never really fully let your guard down with anyone. Never fully tell them all your problems.

So, when a problem does come up, you feel all alone. You feel this pressure for your life to be perfect, and you know it is not. So, you try to hide those difficult and hard things in your life, try to deal with them on your own. And sometimes that works, but not always, and not now.

Now imagine that you are walking down the beach listening to the waves, and all you can think about is how proud you are for everything you have achieved. You rose from the flames to become even stronger than before, and you realize that you can have it all, at home and work. Life means living to the fullest, and you are not going to let anything stand in your way of real happiness.

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Counseling for Men

As a man you are taught to be tough, be strong, and be brave. Society tells you, don’t be weak, and never fail. You might feel pressure to look a certain way. You might feel the pressure to financially take care of your family. You were told ‘no pain, no gain’, so you keep pushing on, even when it hurts. You might have even gotten the advice to ‘rub some dirt on it’. You were never taught to take care of your inner feelings.

So when you do struggle, its hard, and you might feel like you have no one to talk to. You feel so much pressure inside. Anger, might be the only emotion you can express sometimes, but you feel more than anger inside. You might feel hurt, and sad, and unheard, and all alone.

But the thing is, your life doesn’t have to keep going like this. Being a man doesn’t have to mean holding everything inside all the time. It can mean taking control of your feelings and learning to express them in a positive way so that you can focus on your happiness, your confidence, and your future. So you can be the man you want to be.

Just like your toolbox has many different tools to help you fix things. Counseling can help you add new tools to your toolbox, to help you learn to fix some of the emotions that are inside of you. Just like changing the oil in your car, and checking your tire pressure, talking to a counselor can help you maintain optimum performance of yourself, so you can have the future that you want and deserve.

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Ready To Get Started?

I offer online counseling throughout Florida, so you can stay in the comfort of your own home. Schedule a free 20-minute consultation and find out how I can help.

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Kellie Brown is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR Counselor that specializes in providing counseling for both women and men in Florida.

About the Author

Kellie Brown

Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR Counselor in Florida

As a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR counselor in Florida Kellie Brown has experience providing counseling for both women and men. Based in Central Florida but providing online counseling throughout Florida, she wants counseling to be easy and convenient for her clients.

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Needing to Relax? Check these out!!

One of the very first things I suggest to every single one of my clients is to start using guided relaxation exercises. I recommend starting with a very short one and working your way to a longer one as you get better at them. Below are some apps and websites for you to check out. There are so many out there for you to choose from, everyone is different with what they like, find what works for you.

Head Space: https://www.headspace.com/ - You can download the app from the app store, but the website also has tons of great info from articles on how to get better sleep to tacking life goals. At the time of this writing Head Space was free to try for fourteen days, and then charged a fee of $5.99 a month or $69.99 a year.

Calm: https://www.calm.com/ - Again another app you can download. I like the stories that it has that you can play to help you fall asleep. Like headspace you get a free trial period, but Calm’s trial period is shorter at seven days, then you get charged rates of $12.99 a month, $59.99 a year, or $299.99 for a lifetime subscription.

There are a lot of other relaxation apps on the market besides Calm and Head Space (I am not affiliated with any of them), so if you don’t like these don’t worry, you have tons more options out there.

Another one of my go to’s for relaxation exercises is the itunes music store, where they have tons of guided relaxation exercises you can buy, and keep forever.

Something else that I want to share is my favorite free website I send clients to all the time: https://students.dartmouth.edu/wellness-center/wellness-mindfulness/mindfulness-meditation/guided-audio-recordings . It’s a university website that puts out great free info (I did not go to this school), and the audio recordings give you a taste of all different types of relaxation and mindfulness exercises. I found this website at the beginning of my career, and I keep going back to it day after day because I think they have really great info that people can really use.

I hoped you liked exploring some of these great tools to help you relax. I hope you found something that you like, but if you didn’t, just know that there are tons of other options out there, or you can even make your own!! It’s about finding what works best for you. Take care and if you have any questions, just let me know.

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Using alcohol or pills to cope with the past?

It started off as a way to relax, to ease some of the anxiety, some of the tension. But one drink, turned into another one, and another one. You might have even started using pills, taking more and more. Heck, the pills might even be prescribed, but you know you are using too many.

You use to drink for fun, to be social, but now you are drinking or using pills to just get through the day. To cope with the bad feelings, to help you not think about those thoughts that keep you up at night. It’s turned into a crutch and you feel like you need it.

You find yourself not being honest with others about how much you use. Hiding bottles, secretly throwing them away. You don’t want to deal with their negative comments, they don’t understand. Sometimes you try to stop, but it’s hard.

Many people turn to unhealthy behaviors to help them cope with stressful things. Talking to a counselor can help you get back on the right track, and learn new ways to cope and deal with some of the stuff from your past. So you can focus on the good things in your life, and start working towards a new you. Change is possible, but you have to take the first step.

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Ready To Get Started?

I offer online counseling throughout Florida, so you can stay in the comfort of your own home. Schedule a free 20-minute consultation and find out how I can help.

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Thinking of talking to a counselor?

You have been thinking of talking to a counselor. Thinking of reaching out for some help. You have had a problem for some time now. Might have even had a loved one encourage you to go to counseling, and talk to someone. But you hoped that maybe things would get better on their own, maybe the problems would just go away. But they don’t.

And who wants to talk to a counselor anyways? Who wants to talk to a complete stranger, open up about your deepest darkest problems, laying them all out? Letting your wounds come open. You know it’s going to hurt, bringing up all those feelings.

But the thing is, those yucky feelings aren’t going to just go away on their own. You are going to need to get them out. And talking with a counselor can help make that part easier. So you have the support you need to get through this tough stuff. So you can come out of it even stronger than before.

So you can stop looking at the past, and start looking towards the future. Seeing the light instead of the darkness. And finding a new confidence within yourself, so you can start feeling better and happier with who you are and where you are headed.

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Ready To Get Started?

I offer online counseling throughout Florida, so you can stay in the comfort of your own home. Schedule a free 20-minute consultation and find out how I can help you get the help you need.

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Kellie Brown is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR Therapist providing online counseling throughout Florida.

About the Author

Kellie Brown, Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR Therapist in Florida

As a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR Therapist in Florida, Kellie Brown knows that talking to a counselor for the first time is a huge step. With her company, Quiet Water Counseling of Florida she provides counseling to both women and men. Based in Central Florida but offering online counseling, including online EMDR counseling, throughout Florida she wants counseling to be easy and convenient for her clients.

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Tips to Cope with Anxiety

When you have anxiety you can’t think straight, can’t stop worrying, and you feel like everything is about to collapse. Your heart might feel like it’s racing, or you might start sweating. For some people anxiety is so bad it even keeps them up at night. The worst part is that it feels uncontrollable. Like a train on the tracks about to smash everything to pieces. You just want it to stop. Anxiety can be really tough to deal with but the good news is that there are a lot of tools that can help you so that it does not take over your life.

Exercise. When anxiety is building up one of the best things you can do is move your body. Get outside if you can, go for a jog, or take a walk. Give your mind a change of scenery and work off some of that adrenaline that has built up. Many of us know that exercise is good for us physically but exercise is also great for us mentally. So incorporate exercise into your daily routine.

Self-care. Our lives are so busy these days. Most people don’t make time to take care of themselves. What makes you happy? Going out with a whole bunch of friends or taking a quiet bubble bath? We give so much to others, it’s easy to put ourselves on the back burner. But ignoring your own needs for too long can cause anxiety to build up so make yourself a priority.

Another great tool to use if you are experiencing anxiety is journaling. Sometimes just writing your worries out and putting them to paper helps you clear out your mind. Keep a journal close to your bed or in your car and the next time you start feeling anxious, write about it.

Try a guided relaxation exercise. It’s best to start with a short one at first as it can be difficult to follow along in the beginning but even relaxing for five minutes can really help with your anxiety. There are many different guided relaxation apps, but you can also find relaxation exercises on youtube, or just with a quick search of the internet. Try a few out and find one that you really like as guided relaxation exercises can really help you to feel less anxious.

Anxiety can be really difficult but the good news is that there are a lot of tools to help you cope. But if you find that you are not getting better or even getting worse please reach out to a counselor or your medical provider.

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Ready to start counseling for anxiety? Schedule a consultation now.

I offer online counseling throughout Florida, so you can stay in the comfort of your own home while still getting the help you need. Click below to schedule a free 20-minute consultation and find out how I can help you start living the life you want.

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Kellie Brown is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR Therapist in Florida. She specializes in providing counseling for anxiety issues.

About the Author

Kellie Brown Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Florida

Kellie Brown is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified EMDR Therapist in Florida specializing in providing counseling to people with anxiety issues. Based in Central Florida and providing online counseling throughout Florida she wants counseling to be easy and convenient for her clients. She knows that counseling for anxiety can really make a difference in a person’s life so if you have any questions about counseling for anxiety in Florida please reach out.

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Panic Attack Tools

Experiencing a panic attack can be scary and overwhelming. You might feel like your heart is racing, a sense of terror, or a loss of control. Your symptoms might be so bad that you even call 911 and go to the emergency room. You might have tried anxiety medications, or other things to control your feelings, but they don’t always work. You need real tools to help you cope with the panic you are feeling.

The first thing to remember when having a panic attack is to keep breathing. Taking slow deep breaths can really help. Turn on a fan, or open a window, get some fresh air to help you relax.

Another great tool to use if you are experiencing a panic attack is “grounding”. This is when you “ground” yourself to your present and remind yourself that you are safe, using your five senses. Notice what you see around you, use your sense of touch to feel something close to you, notice what you hear, use your nose to smell any comforting scents in the air, and if you have any food or drink nearby take a bite or sip and notice how they taste. Find your own way to incorporate grounding as a tool next time you experience a panic attack.

The next tool for panic attacks is called H.A.L.T. Ask yourself if you are Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired (HALT)? If you are then it might be time to take care of your basic needs before your symptoms worsen. Make sure that you are eating and hydrating regularly, and sleeping well. If you are feeling your anger increasing or loneliness worsening make these a priority as well, don’t let negative feelings build up to the point where they are impacting you in a bad way. Taking care of yourself is very important.

Panic attacks can be really difficult but the good news is that there are a lot of tools to help you cope with them. But if you find that you are not getting better or even getting worse please reach out to a counselor. Oftentimes talking to a counselor, even for a few sessions can help.

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